I am so grateful I was able to bring my girl home yesterday, snuggle up and talk with her last night, read Pinkalicious, hold her while she fell asleep, and watch her sleep. I finally had to turn off the news coverage of the horrific events in Connecticut. As a mom and teacher, that is the worst possible experience I could imagine. All those kids that you love and are responsible for, and to be so helpless... I talked to Katie about it. Her only question was, "Why?" which I could not answer.
By 6:30 this morning, I had a little girl clomping around the house in my heels, wanting pink milk with her breakfast. I keep thinking about the little kids that didn't wake up this morning, and the moms who won't get to play with their kid ever again. Happily, for the last couple hours, I've been playing doctor and horses with Katie. When she plays doctor, she puts a blanket over the treadmill, and that's her examination table. (Btw, I was diagnosed with a fever, but I'm over it now, thanks to come medicine.) When we play horses, I'm usually the baby horse and the mane and tail braider. I lost count of how many I've braided this morning. That's why I can never find a hair band or the detangler spray when I need it for Katie.
I should be able to turn off the tv and brush over the news, but it's sticking in my mind and my heart.
Maybe it's because I feel like an emotional cripple after this week. Between contemplating some changes, trying to plan for changes, stressing about what's best for us, finishing up my class, fighting holiday aloness and just trying to get everything done, I'm drained. The tragedy up there has reminded me that none of my crap really matters, in the big picture. I have my girl safe and sound.
Well, she may not be safe and sound for long, because she just dismantled a glue stick and proceeded to smear it all over the kitchen table, because it was stuck to her hands, and that's the "only way she could get it off."
Now, it's time for my favorite Christmas music and some house cleaning!
Saturday, December 15, 2012
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We practice Safety Lockdowns each month. The first one of the year I explain to my class that we have a second way out of our room if we ever need it...a window with a big step right under it. I also tell them that anyone who tries to come into our room will have to go through me first. The teachers and administrators at Sandy Hook gave everything for their "kids". May God bless each of them, the lost children, those who survived and all the families and friends who are going through this horrific event.
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